Weathered

So it seemed that I can't avoid disasters. My loves hard drive decided to give up the ghost at an inopportune time. Work was pounding me down with an absurd amount of tasks to complete before winter vacation. All in all this has been one of the most difficult two month stretches of my life. Each day seeming to bring a new pile on of challenges and defeats.

I think things had gone so well in the past that I had forgotten what it was like to not have things go your way. This Monday was the first date in a while where i realized.... wow this all worked out. And it was a good feeling. A feeling i missed. And now a feeling im more grateful than ever to have.

When things are down it is so hard to hold onto that optimist. And the two past months have been the definition of when it rains it pours. I probably wont be posting again for the rest of the year. So i want to tell you. If its been raining on ya for a couple of days to a couple of years. Dont give up and stick to your principles. If you find that your plans have failed adjust them but don't lose the dream.

Have a happy New Years.

The Jitters

It’s been a strange week. Work has slowed down to the point of almost a crawl. Which is good and bad. Also this week I decided to stop smoking. No slow down, no gradual removal. At 8am this Monday morning I just decided to stop. Cold turkey. I can tell ya that the last 24 hours have been pretty hard. Today I am particularly shaky, jittery and I have a ripping head ache. And as I said before work is slow. I was hoping to get lost in some great diversion. But it seems to be one of those rare weeks where I basically am just picking some random loose ends and running with it.

I’m also trying to get some personal finance matters in order which has been nothing short of uber frustrating. Why is it that just two years ago I was able to make a phone call and have my wife’s student loans consolidated in 15 minutes. Now I have to go through a series of ridiculous steps. At least they seem ridiculous compared to how it used to be. Sigh. The more I write about this the more I’m obsessing about smoking so I’m going to stop. See ya’s around.

5 out of 4 Americans do not understand fractions

A very action packed and busy week this one is. A lot of arranging collecting researching design implementing type of stuff. And that was just trying to get my WoW to work post patch!! Ah it’s a rough life!!!

Lots to cover lets get rolling…

The Jury is still out on Science

Apparently the green onions used by Taco bell on the east coast was contaminated with Ecoli. For now there is no chance that you can receive green onions with your meal at any location. I think the big story hear is that science has confirmed that the green onions found in Taco bell tacos were actually a natural plant not some rubber by product crafted in China. Sad Panda!!!

Science continued to rock our faces off this week by discovering that there may have been or still be water on Mars. Is it wrong that after I read this I looked into buying land on mars? Martian Mineral Water…. Should sell like hot cakes. Now the only question remains on how to attach a canteen to a dog’s neck and shoot him up there.

When good isn’t good enough

There are few moments in a sports franchise history where it seems the stars align. It began with an uber easy schedule. It continued with a defense returning to full health. It picked up steam as a draft pick meant for special teams turned into a star. Opponents collapsed around them. An air of invincibility surrounded them. In fact they have barely had any challengers. The one hurdle that remains. The one thing that causes us die hards to loose a couple winks of sleep each night. Inconsistency at QB.

Man this kid started out SO hot early this year. But the cocky gunslinger is a lot less appealing when he starts trying for TD’s on every throw. I empathize with the guy. He wants to be the hero. He wants to silence the critics and the boos that now rain down on him simply by him taking the field. The problem is that he is in a land of desperation. If the bears had won a championship within the last couple of years a guarantee the patience level would be higher.

In example. This year Brian Anderson started playing center field for my beloved White Sox. He stunk. He stunk out loud. And the more people got on him, the more he started adding that uppercut to his swing. He was firing for the fences hoping to smack that one ball clear out of the stadium that would shut up the critics and turn the heat off him or at least onto someone else. Well we stuck with this dude all year. Why? He clearly was underperforming at his position. It’s desperation and that’s an intangible that the Sox did not have last year. And that’s why an underperformer like Anderson was able to hover below the radar.

Now we see Rex and believe me I am rooting for the kid all out. It would please me to no end to see this kid play out the rest of the year in the same fashion he started it. However, more than I want the Rex to succeed I want the Bears to succeed. And that’s why we have to give Griese a shot. If only to look at all options before we take the field for the games that really matter.

Oh, and Cedric Benson is a tank.

The biggest most importantest news!!!

The new season of The Shield is 33 days away!!!

Trailer Trash

Go check out trailers at http://www.apple.com/trailers/

The Simpson: - It’s a clever trailer. But this is nothing more than a Dvd Purchase to me.

Hostel 2: - Creepy German overdub!!! Probably will pirate this one just like the last one.

Bug: - Brain Eating Bugs. I think the only thing eating my brain after watching this film will be the lingering pain of two hours lost.

Smokin Aces: - Admittedly I am intrigued. The only problem I see is that I’m not sure if this is a goof or a serious film. My guess is goof rather than a Lock Stock and two Smoking Barrells. Probably piracy at best.

Looks like there are few reasons to visit the theater any time soon. But there is some hope in the theaters right now…

For your Consideration

Best of the pretentious series since Dog Show. However I think the formula is wearing thin. I think they had a genuinely funny idea and script but some of the roles just seemed to be done so blandly and almost too many roles felt like cameos. Just to give the type of nerd who watches the films that unexplainable rush when he see a familiar face in a film. Oh my gosh its that guy! LOLOLOL. Anyhow it’s a good funny film. Probably will be funnier the second time I watch it. I hear that it may be the last from that ensemble which is fitting considering the material. I don’t think they could pull off a better good bye.

Why I am paranoid

It comes to my attention that this week a plane was diverted due to the scent of smoke or matches lingering in the cabin. Rightfully so the plane was quickly landed and people were questioned while the plane was searched. It was then that it came out. Apparently a passenger had started lighting matches in order to cover up the odors that their body was producing.

In their defense: The passenger did have a medical condition…..
Objective response: Matches!! Fire!! Are you nuts!!!!!

In their defense: Have you ever had someone throw up on a flight? You’ll be begging for some matches after an hour of that….
Objective response: Matches!! Fire!! Are you nuts!!!!! You’re on a plane!!!!

Billboards don’t lie

I watched the billboard music awards. Here’s a list of 10 things I remembered

1. Janet Jackson opens. And doesn’t even try to pretend that she just might sorta possibily be almost nearly singing. At least have the class to hold a mic over your mouth Janet. That’s the way the pros do it. Aint that right Bono.
2. Well thank God that’s over on to our next person to yap…. Ah crap here comes Kid Rock. For someone with kid in his moniker he sure is not aging gracefully. But I guess he was never a healthy looking dude to begin with.
3. And now a performance by Fergie. I appreciated her rapping it’s a lot like Gwen Steffani’s minus talent grace vocals and beauty.
4. And now a performance by Gwen Steffani which was a lot like Fergie’s minus the plastic surgery.
5. Aw nice here comes Sulu!! Seriously he inspires me to wear white eye shadow and talk in a creepy voice. Can you imagine him ordering at McDonalds? I did and then I laughed through whatever it was he talked about.
6. When did “The Fray” become popular? Their song isn’t even that strong. I do appreciate his throw back to grunge delivery of lyrics. Not my favourite thing when a crooner piano ballad guy is incomprehensible except for his tagline. I’m going with some form of palsy as the resolution to this question.
7. I always wondered if people who sing in that incomprehensible manner are equally hard to talk to. If Tom Yorke from Radio head and Mush Mouth from Fat Albert sat down at a table would world peace result?
8. Out of no where its time to honor Tony Bennett. Who is the only Bennett I know that can actually sing. Oh TAG!!!
9. Tony B. is a classy dude and well dressed. He said some kind things to his fans I wish he would have sung a song and sent us all to bed happy. Instead we get..
10. To close the show it involved Kid Rock ZZTop and Nickleback.
1. Kid Rock – I humbly admit I enjoyed his debut but yeah I enjoyed eating finger paint as a child as well. We all make mistakes.
2. ZZTOP – Hearing them on classical rock radio reminds me that it’s time to change the dial.
3. Nickleback – Canadas worst import since Jayson J.

Final Thoughts

If you aren’t fighting the power at age 21 you’ve got no soul.
If you haven’t sold out by age 30 you’ve got no sense.
Your getting old when Saturday house parties begin to be referred to as “dinner parties”

So Much Content Is waiting for you!!!

...... later this week.

Not today. Nope I've got more guns to my head than a lost nun in Detriot.

I cross my fingers behind my back promise to bring you a column this week.

Until then be amazed by this video discussion on levitating dead girls by MR. ????

Revisit the Retro

So this weekend I found myself smoking in a garage as incense burned and attractive folk sat around in dirty couches talking away an idle winter evening. It was clearly as if someone had stuffed me into a time machine and sent me to ten years ago. Strangely this past has resumed its reign as my present. The difference??? Children. It was a joyful surprise when I first learned that our friend would have kids. Now we can see the changes. Have a cig? Don't mind if I do? Oh thats right smoke in this garage, keep the smell contained and your voice down the kids are right next door. So that strike one.

Strike two. It wasn't but just last year we were living the good life. What are you doing for new years? Oh nothing? How about we fly to Vegas? Why? Just to fly to vegas thats why!!!

This year. Yes why dont we go to phoenix for spring break. Oh that sounds great oh and lets get a cruise going this month. Sounds exceptional. Oh im going to have to see if i can get a babysitter.......... WOW. I mean frickin wow man. Kids!!! Kids!!! Now almost in sympathy we should share the burden. Why should 1 couple be screwed? Lets all tie ourselves down and share in the misery and joy. Ah freedom. I feel that i am clutching to your fingertips hanging above a chasm. The question is, are you the Stalone from the opening moments of Cliffhanger or the closing? Either way, theres no chance that I will go see the new Rocky film unless i get VERY drunk before hand.

And that my friends was the greatest literary segue known to man. Now for a quality pun title.

St(alone) in a theater...

Are you going to see this? Should this have ever been green lit? The only reason to watch in my opinion would be to hear Stalone use street slang and see how good of a shape he actually got into. Speaking of which lets just give kudos where kudos are due.

Stalone is better than you...

He's like 95 years old and hes got a 6 pack. Suck on that twenty somethings with a pooch!! This dago that wont quit or go to a speech therapist has a frickin six pack!!!

And that my friends is how you make 2 mundane ideas and stretch them to three segments!!

The Bears

Well it's now official the Bears will be in the playoffs. The question is will Rex the Wonder Bear still be throwing the ball come that time. Either way party at my house!!

Oh and I saw some recent photos of myself. All decked out suit tie rockstar emo hair. Looking drunk as an irishman on a sunday morning. Why does booze make you feel debonair? Theres no difference when putting on a suit, it just makes you look like a well dressed drunk guy. Eyes half open. Martini glass in hand. Sigh...

Baby it's cold outside

If you live in the midwest and didn't notice its cold out side you need to get off the pain killers. What made it tens of times worst was that it was 60 degrees the previous day. I awoke that fine morning to the sounds of am radio. But clearly this was a day unlike any other. It was clear anarchy had taken hold of our frozen continent. Society had broke down. Major traffic throughways were completely blocked off.

So i slept in an extra hour and the restarted my routine. Funny thing. There was no one on the road. No snow on the road. It was actually one of the more peaceful drives that i can remember. So the moral of this tale is this. Cold is not something to fear. Dont believe the hype of morning radio. We are Chicagoans and this is nothing we havent seen before.

Just a reminder for the next time it snows six inches or more.

Wicked late update

Sorry the system that allows me to post seems to schedule down time during my only moments of free time.

From Russia with Love

So what do we have here!! Murder? Most foul…. Arent spies and intrigue supposed to take place below the public radar? Suddenly we have a Russian spy turn into Americas darling and now a former Prime minister seems to be sharing his fate. Nuclear materials seem to be all over the place so what is going on? Clearly Canada is making their move. They are teaming with the Russians? Why because it’s getting cold. And their cold dark Canadian hearts desire to return to the fires of hell. And since they don’t have the resources to manufacture a shovel they have just decided to bulldoze their way down to Mexico. I for one hail our new mounted French overlords.

Wow one unfunny paragraph in and I am already stretching for material. Happy Friday!!

Baby its cold outside

Just to keep a dead gag running; apparently the Canadians also have some sort of weather ray, as two days ago it was 60 degrees and today I woke up to death destruction and an unfamiliar layer of white powder coating the surface of the earth. Now many of you when you see snow decide that you can make the same movements and lane changes that you do in normal weather. The looks on your faces as I pass you tells the story. I can see the dead, vacant look in your eyes. You gambled and you lost. At least try to maintain some form of bravado.

If your so gung ho about getting to your destination. Don’t let that ditch your upside down in slow ya down. Unhook your safety belt. Crack your head on the fall. Baby crawl through the broke glass and plastic. Realize that you have no feeling in your legs and stand right back up again. Then remove all your clothes and start walking ‘cause you have decided that under no circumstances your are going to let the snow win or show any one else that you are concerned by its presence.

Nerd corner

Start > Run > type “perfmon.exe” > Ok *cool pre-installed system monitor*

Final Thoughts:

1. When did Mel Gibson go from bad ass to pretentious crazy?
2. I was glad we were on the phone when you told me that you did nothing but play with your Wii for the last 3 days.